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Thread: Is he interested only in sex?

  1. #1

    Default Is he interested only in sex?

    You are looking for love, but you are worried the new man in your life is only looking for sex. How do you know if you are being "played" before it is too late? And how do you know when to trust that you are NOT being played, and let your heart fully embrace this new relationship?

    These are questions that all women must ask, but that very few can actually answer. To help you along in figuring these things out, here is a guideline for determining if the man in your life is only interested in "sex," or if he is truly interested in "you."

    1. If he says he wants to keep it casual, believe him.

    If your man has ever told you that he is not ready for a commitment, that he is just looking to have fun or that he is not looking for anything serious, do yourself a favor - believe him. Many women try to convince themselves that once this man gets to know them, his attitude towards relationships will change. It won't. If he is telling you these things, then he is essentially letting you know that this is a casual relationship and it is going to stay that way until he is ready to move on to someone else. There is no need for guessing games here. He has essentially come right out and told you he is only interested in sex. You will have no one to blame but yourself if you choose to believe otherwise.

    2. Trust your instincts.

    While your gut can let you down at times, it is still the most reliable source for detecting B.S. While you definitely should believe it when a man tells you he is not interested in a serious relationship, this does not necessarily mean that you should automatically believe him when he says he IS interested in a commitment. Some men will tell you anything you want to hear just to get you into bed, or to keep you there if you've already gone that far.

    If your gut is telling you that he is insincere and that all he is really interested in is sex, then you owe it to yourself to find out if your instincts are right. A professional psychic can help you figure out if the little voice inside of you telling you he is "a player" is on the mark, or if it is just your fear of getting hurt talking.

    3. Monitor his behavior

    The old saying, "actions speak louder than words," is not just a cliche, it is a fact. Men who are only interested in sex will behave in ways that are often far more telling than the words coming out of their mouths. Some of these telltale signs include:

    *He doesn't spend much time with you before or after sex

    *He makes advances when you are trying to talk about serious matters

    *He looks more at your chest than at your eyes

    *He waits more than 24 hours to return your calls, emails or texts

    *He doesn't introduce you to his friends or family

    *He always wants to just "hang out" instead of taking you on a real date

    *The only compliments he pays you are physical or sexual

    4. Find out about his history

    If you are lucky enough to have mutual friends or acquaintances with your man, then you have access to the most valuable resources possible. If his friends are telling you that he is a player or a heartbreaker, then they just might be telling you the truth. Of course, you may end up with conflicting stories and find your self wondering who you should believe, which can be truly maddening. But unless you are talking to your man's actual exes, who may have an axe to grind, the information you are receiving is likely to be fairly reliable.

    By the same token, if his friends are telling him what a wonderful guy he is and how much he likes you, there is probably some truth to that too. Again, consulting a psychic is a great way to confirm or deny what you are hearing. Just make sure you are as subtle as possible when gathering your information because you don't want to make him think you are snooping behind his back.

    5. Cut him off

    If you have not already had sex with your man, then make him wait as long as possible. If he is truly interested in you and not just in sex, then he will have no problem waiting until you feel ready. If you are already having sex, then temporarily stop it. The reason you give him can be anything from stress to being too busy, to "it's a woman thing" (they usually don't want too many details when you tell them that).

    You don't want to lie, but by putting him off sex for at least a week you will be able to find out what he is really all about. If he gets angry, if he stops calling you or visiting you, if he tries to talk you into having sex anyway, if he tries to make you feel guilty...any of these reactions will give you all the red flags you need to let you know that sex is the only thing on his mind. If he truly cares about you he will not mind waiting a week, and he will still enjoy spending time with you doing other things.

    6. Make it all Make Sense

    If you follow these guidelines, you should be able to get a decent feel for how your man feels about you. If you are concerned that he is only interested in sex but you are still unsure because he only fits some of the patterns listed above, then do your best to sort out what signs are meaningful and when you may be reading too much into things. Everyone has a tendency to over-analyze at times, so it is best to get the advice of an objective third party. Once you feel confident that you and your man are either on the same page or in completely different chapters, then you can begin to make confident, healthy decisions about your relationship.

  2. #2
    Super Moderator Pope Bitterz D'Alomo's Avatar
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    'Couldn't have agreed with you more but, following guidlines seldom steers one wrong.

    Are the MEN listening ? Now my twist on it.

    1. If she says she doesn't wants to keep it casual, DON'T BELIEVE HER.

    If your woman has ever told you that she is ready for a commitment, that she isn't just looking to have fun or that she is looking for anything serious, do yourself a favor - don't believe her. Many women try to convince themselves that once this man gets to know them, her attitude towards relationships will change. It won't. If she is telling you these things, then she is essentially not letting you know that this is not a casual relationship and it is not going to stay that way until she is ready to move on to someone else. There is a need for guessing games here. she has essentially not come right out and told you she is not only interested in sex. You will have no one to blame but yourself if you choose to believe otherwise.

    2. Trust your instincts.

    Some women will tell you anything you want to hear just to get you into bed, or to keep you there if you've already gone that far.

    If your gut is telling you that she is insincere and that all she is really interested in is sex and benefits, then you owe it to yourself to find out if your instincts are right. If the little voice inside of you is telling you she is "a playa" SHE IS.
    Last edited by Pope Bitterz D'Alomo; 7th September 2010 at 06:02 AM.
    Beware lest you lose the substance by grasping at the shadow. ~Aesop

    Ignorance can be educated,drunkenness sobered,craziness medicated but there is no cure for STUPIDITY


  3. #3
    Godfather Chapati's Avatar
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    hahahahahaha pope. i wish i have something to add. but nope. i will be readin wat pple will put here.............lol

  4. #4
    Super Moderator Pope Bitterz D'Alomo's Avatar
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    3. Monitor her behavior

    The old saying, "actions speak louder than words," is not just a cliche, it is a fact. women who are only interested in sex will behave in ways that are often far more telling than the words coming out of their mouths. Some of these telltale signs include:

    *she doesn't spend much time with you before or after sex

    *she makes advances when you are trying to talk about serious matters

    *she looks more at your chest and "gadgets" than at your eyes

    *she waits more than 24 hours to return your calls, emails or texts

    *she doesn't introduce you to her friends or family

    *she always wants to just "hang out" instead of taking you on a real date

    *The only compliments she pays you are physical or sexual

    4. Find out about her history

    If you are lucky enough to have mutual friends or acquaintances with your woman, then you have access to the most valuable resources possible. If his friends are telling you that she is a player or a heartbreaker, then they just might be telling you the truth. Of course, you may end up with conflicting stories and find your self wondering who you should believe, which can be truly maddening. But unless you are talking to your woman's actual exes, who may have an axe to grind, the information you are receiving is likely to be fairly reliable.

    By the same token, if her friends are telling her what a wonderful woman she is and how much she likes you, there is probably some truth to that too. Just make sure you are as subtle as possible when gathering your information because you don't want to make her think you are snooping behind her back.
    Beware lest you lose the substance by grasping at the shadow. ~Aesop

    Ignorance can be educated,drunkenness sobered,craziness medicated but there is no cure for STUPIDITY


  5. #5

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by sacristo View Post
    You are looking for love, but you are worried the new man in your life is only looking for sex. How do you know if you are being "played" before it is too late? And how do you know when to trust that you are NOT being played, and let your heart fully embrace this new relationship?

    These are questions that all women must ask, but that very few can actually answer. To help you along in figuring these things out, here is a guideline for determining if the man in your life is only interested in "sex," or if he is truly interested in "you."

    1. If he says he wants to keep it casual, believe him.

    2. Trust your instincts.

    3. Monitor his behavior

    4. Find out about his history

    5. Cut him off

    6. Make it all Make Sense

    If you follow these guidelines, you should be able to get a decent feel for how your man feels about you. If you are concerned that he is only interested in sex but you are still unsure because he only fits some of the patterns listed above, then do your best to sort out what signs are meaningful and when you may be reading too much into things. Everyone has a tendency to over-analyze at times, so it is best to get the advice of an objective third party. Once you feel confident that you and your man are either on the same page or in completely different chapters, then you can begin to make confident, healthy decisions about your relationship.
    Well said bro....sometimes it might hurt though to bring yourself to face the realities on the ground especially when your heart flickers just at the sound of his voice. After all is said and done, you sit back to ask yourself, was I being stupid or I was just in love........

    Just talking to him and being around him makes your world turn and so its hard for you to take a step back and think........is he playing me for real?

    We ladies may have a hard time reading in between the lines to figure out whether we are really being played or not because how we see and judge situations differ from that of guys.

    Thanks bro

  6. #6
    Super Moderator Pope Bitterz D'Alomo's Avatar
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    hmmm at ^^
    Beware lest you lose the substance by grasping at the shadow. ~Aesop

    Ignorance can be educated,drunkenness sobered,craziness medicated but there is no cure for STUPIDITY


  7. #7

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Pope Bitterz D'Alomo View Post
    hmmm at ^^
    I presume that shot was directed to Cutie LOL

  8. #8

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    Quote Originally Posted by MegaMeister View Post
    I presume that shot was directed to Cutie LOL
    loool Mega IDTS.....he dares not.........lmaooooooooooo

  9. #9
    Super Moderator Pope Bitterz D'Alomo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CuTiEbABy View Post
    loool Mega IDTS.....he dares not.........lmaooooooooooo
    Encore
    Beware lest you lose the substance by grasping at the shadow. ~Aesop

    Ignorance can be educated,drunkenness sobered,craziness medicated but there is no cure for STUPIDITY


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