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Thread: Application for Employment

  1. #1

    Default Application for Employment

    The Managing Director

    Foods and Beverages (N) Ltd.,

    Ingbo Village Road

    Lagos

    Nigeria


    Dear Sir,


    REF: APPLICATION FOR EMPLOYMENT

    I refer to the recent death of the Technical Manager at your
    company and wish to apply for the replacement of the dead manager.

    Each time I apply for employment I am told there is no vacancy
    but on this one, I have caught you red handed coz I even attended the
    funeral and all burial proceedings and made sure that he was truly dead
    before applying. I can remember you saying on the funeral that he will
    be very difficult to replace, meaning there is no one at the moment.
    Well, it's your lucky day, Sir! You already have found the best man for
    the job so look no more.

    It is sad but strategic though, that he has left us, at least
    now I stand to benefit as he has left a vacancy for me. For that I shall
    forever be grateful for his timely death. He too always spoke of early
    retirement and I guess this serves him well too. A deal that benefits
    all should be the substance of a fine businessman. Ironic, yes but death
    is truly very fair.

    Just imagine, the company no longer has to pay his retirement
    funds. The company will not have to worry about paying me a relocation
    allowance because he was my neighbour and it will be easy for me to
    simply jump over the Durawall into that beautiful big company house. I
    also took it into my hands to quickly buy a drivers' licence as I am
    sure the Toyota 4x4 will also be handed over to me. And sir, don't even
    try to cheat me on this one because I even know the mileage reading on
    that beautiful machine. This just goes on to prove that I am a
    determined self starter who is attentive to detail. Amiable qualities
    that speak for themselves.

    I am sure that after reading this, there won't be any need for a
    CV, just verification if I am up for the challenge. For that sir, I will
    be sending my pictures taken whilst attending the funeral and burial so
    that you can see how tough I was and can be when employed. As for my
    referees, well the same dead manager was my referee so we can safely
    skip that part.

    I only hope there will be no corruption as we are all still
    mourning! Thanks for advertising at the funeral because I could not have
    known.

    Yours Ever,


    Moses Mubi Kibitbo

    P. O. 6662

    Lungujja - Saverani

  2. #2

    Default

    lol thats really funny sis..thanks for the laugh

  3. #3
    Moderator syc's Avatar
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    Sep 2010
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    lmfaoooooooooooooo

    This looks like a "i want my inheritance (you dare not cheat me)" letter

  4. #4
    Super Moderator Pope Bitterz D'Alomo's Avatar
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    Jul 2010
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    Asamankese,Japan
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    7,539

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    This guy means business..lol

    This just goes on to prove that I am a
    determined self starter who is attentive to detail. Amiable qualities
    that speak for themselves.

    I am sure that after reading this, there won't be any need for a
    CV, just verification if I am up for the challenge. For that sir, I will
    be sending my pictures taken whilst attending the funeral and burial so
    that you can see how tough I was and can be when employed. As for my
    referees, well the same dead manager was my referee so we can safely
    skip that part.

    I only hope there will be no corruption as we are all still
    mourning! Thanks for advertising at the funeral because I could not have
    known.
    Beware lest you lose the substance by grasping at the shadow. ~Aesop

    Ignorance can be educated,drunkenness sobered,craziness medicated but there is no cure for STUPIDITY


  5. #5

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    Quote Originally Posted by Enchantress View Post
    lol thats really funny sis..thanks for the laugh
    Glad you had a laugh like I did.

  6. #6
    Bipolar Neo's Avatar
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    Jul 2010
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    5,583

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    Lol. This man is fierce. Nawawo. nice cutie

  7. #7

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    Quote Originally Posted by Neo View Post
    Lol. This man is fierce. Nawawo. nice cutie
    Thanks bro

  8. #8

    Default

    Throw in an internet cafe or a laptop and you've got yourself a 419 coacktail.

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