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Neo
22nd August 2012, 09:58 PM
It happens time and time again, your friend doesn’t get along with your boyfriend or suddenly so many of your friends disappear when you get a new boyfriend. Yes, relationships can sometimes destroy or end some of your greatest friendships. But whose fault is it? The girl with the new man or the reactions of her friends when she gets the man? It can easily be a combination of both. Let’s have a look at some mistakes that women make when dealing with the new man in their life, whether it’s your man or the friend’s man. Here’s how relationships can destroy friendships:

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Assuming your friends are jealous

“She’s just jealous!”…Let’s be honest, we’ve all probably said this before. This is probably the number one problem that leads to the destruction of friendship. Using jealousy as an excuse to be inconsiderate of your friend’s feelings or not listen to what they have to say is really just an excuse to continue swooning over your man. Your friends maybe genuinely concerned for your well-being or genuinely concerned about your friendship. Yes, it is possible that your friend is jealous, but it is also possible that she is NOT jealous. Don’t let this be an excuse to ignore the real problems.

Expecting everything to be the same

Time to point the finger at the friends on this one…this has got to be one of the most teenaged mistakes that friends make, but believe it or not, women still continue to do it even when they get older. They somehow expect their friend with the new boo to still spend as much time with them. Nothing in life ever stays the same…people change and grow in many different ways. People always accept these changes when it comes to someone getting a new job, living further away or just plain growing up. Why do you expect relationships to be any different?

Replacing your friends with your boo

You’ve been friends for years, and what does your girl do? Toss you aside like a rag doll for some guy she’s only known for a few months. A lot of us definitely know what this feels like. What makes this worse is that the more you try to confront her about this, the more she continues to run to her man. In cases like this, she is seriously just being a bad friend. You probably won’t like the resolution to this one… but in cases like this, sometimes it’s just not worth trying to repair. Your man should never be a replacement for your friends and if your friend can’t see this, then she probably doesn’t value your friendship enough.

Assuming your friends will always be there.

This one is almost like the last one…except in this case it doesn’t start out with negative intent. It’s one of those things where many small things accumulate into something huge. It’s been a while…you’re thinking should I have lunch with the ladies today? No, you say, “I can have lunch with them next time, I’m better off having my man over for a nice home cooked meal.” The ladies are going out tonight, but you say “but they do that every Friday night, so I’m gonna go see my boo instead.” It might even be that you’re having friendship drama, so you decide, I’d rather go chill with my man than deal with all the drama. Is this the right decision? WRONG! You can’t keep putting your friends at the bottom of your priority list. First of all, think about how this will make them feel. Second of all, this works both ways…who are you going to run to when you have problems with your boyfriend? You’ll be lucky if they’re even still there!

Never inviting the boyfriend to come along

Like any normal female, no one wants your friend’s man ruining your “girls night,” but come on ladies, you have to be endearing and inviting to him too. Just because you don’t want him to tag along on girls night, that doesn’t mean that you can’t try a dinner night or some other special event. Making sure to sometimes invite both of them will not only make the boyfriend more accepting of you as her friends, but she will also be more appreciative of you as a friend knowing she can share important aspects of her life with you.



Source: madamenoire